The Democrats Have Nailed Down the Bisexual Adulterer Presidential Ticket for 2028
By Daniel Greenfield
Edwin Edwards used to say, “The only way I can lose this election is if I’m caught in bed with either a dead girl or a live boy.”
Mores are changing and the Andrew Gillum image rehab continues. Andrew Gillum was once the great Democrat hope for flipping Florida. He came into that race with some serious scandals blowing. And then he entirely imploded.
The media considerately avoided discussing the worst of it leaving the field, as usual, to the trashy apolitical British tabloids (at least until the Democrats do to them what they did to the National Enquirer in the name of fighting disinformation, foreign spies, and damaging revelations) to expose it.
SORDID pics show vomit-stained bed sheets, sex pills and bags of suspected crystal meth in a luxury hotel room visited by Florida lawmaker Andrew Gillum.
Miami Beach Police this week released photos and video taken at the room, where the former Democratic gubernatorial candidate was allegedly found drunk after romping with two men.
While it was initially reported that Dyson was a friend of Gillum’s, it was later revealed that the man called himself a “pornstar performer” and had a profile on the website RentMen.Com, according to Florida’s Local10.
On his RentMen profile, he advertised a range of services as a male escort.
A third man, Aldo Mejias, reportedly called police after he entered the hotel room around 11pm and saw Dyson collapse on the bed and throw up.
Mejias, who told cops he gave Dyson CPR and called 911, also alleged to police that Gillum was “under the influence of an unknown substance” in the hotel room.
The man said that while he was giving Dyson CPR, Gillum was in the bathroom throwing up.
After the hotel room encounter became public, Gillum announced he was entering a rehabilitation facility, saying he had fallen into a depression and alcohol abuse after losing his bid for governor.
Can a politician come back from this? Sure, why not.
Gillum followed the Rep. Katie Hill model of declaring he was “bisexual” as if that made anything above okay. But it suddenly made him an oppressed minority whose sexual behavior could no longer be questioned.
Now GQ, in its Modern Lovers series, is pushing the image rehab further with, “How Andrew Gillum’s Marriage Survived a Night of Scandal”.
Remember when Democrats pretended to be feminist and mocked, “Stand By Your Man” only to have Hillary stand by her man while he sexually assaulted unknown numbers of women, and now Gillum’s wife is standing by her… man.
“To keep their marriage together, he and his wife, R. Jai, had to embrace a new dynamic of “radical honesty” in their relationship,” GQ subtitles it under, “Modern Lovers”.
Lefties like attaching “radical” to things to make it sound more radical. It’s not just honesty. It’s radical honesty. “Honey, I’m sleeping with male prostitutes and there’s crystal meth involved.”
Andrew revealed he is attracted to both men and women—instantly making him the most prominent openly bisexual man in American political history, even as it’s unclear what his future in government might hold.
But luckily he’s teaming up with Rep. Katie Hill, the most prominent bisexual woman in American politics.
“Andrew and I would probably be the first test cases,” former congresswoman Katie Hill told me. One of America’s few out bisexual politicians, Hill resigned from office in October 2019 after photos of her naked and combing the hair of a female campaign staffer with whom she was romantically involved were leaked.
Perhaps it’s not surprising that in recent months, Hill and Gillum have struck up a friendship: two rising Democratic stars cut down by images depicting them in ill-advised and vulnerable moments. A younger, more sexually understanding generation of voters, Hill hopes, may eventually enable her or Andrew to again seek public office: “I like to think that it’s possible.”
The Democrats have the 2028 bisexual adulterer presidential ticket nailed down.