Wearing Red/Yellow?

Pebbles

Well-Known Member
Just wondering what y'alls opinion is on this.

My understanding of how Christian ladies should dress is that we should not draw attention to ourselves by what we wear. I've put together/made a few long skirt/cardigan outfits. Most of what I have at the moment is either black or various shades of grey. I'm just weird in that I actually like grey (growing up near Seattle?), and I can mix/match most things.

In this area, I am not sure what is too legalistic, and what is not. Would wearing a red or yellow cardi/flats be considered attention grabbing? I don't want to wear red to get attention, but because I like red, too. However, I've heard both yes and no and am a little confused. I'm a very pale brunette, it that makes any difference. :scratch: :idunno:

Thoughts?
 

Kem

Citizen
God created beautiful colors and I don't see any problem with wearing them. Making sure the body is properly covered and nothing is too form fitting is important as well as not over doing the jewelry and makeup but to dress attractively is not wrong.
 

livin_in_the_Son

Well-Known Member
I agree with Kem. We are supposed to be feminine in our dress as well, and color is a good way to be feminine without being a harlot.

As long as your hemline, and neckline, are at a proper length, the color doesn't matter I don't believe. I wear a lot of black in my dress clothes, but I adore red, pink, and greens. My main concern when I dress is to not only bring honor to my God, but to also not dishonor my husband. I would be remiss if my dress caused my husband embarrassment.
 

livin_in_the_Son

Well-Known Member
Have all the fun you want with color! I say nothing super short- that goes for skirts, shorts etc. Watch the cleavage exposure-bathing suits can be done tastefully as well-If it's not for sale don't put it on display! :lol:
Well, even if it was "for sale", meaning your single, it shouldn't be on display. :lol: People can't see the love of Christ, or anything else if they're too busy seeing "everything" else.
 

Lynn

Longing for Home
People can't see the love of Christ, or anything else if they're too busy seeing "everything" else.
Excellent point! This should be what we think of first when choosing our apparel. As I've grown older in the Lord, it seems that now when I go shopping, I'm not at all attracted to the clothing that I think would put me 'in the spotlight' and people would constantly be saying, 'Oh, that's so pretty' over and over. :doh: I don't seek this kind of attention. There's a difference between being nicely dressed and being 'really' dressed, to the nines as people used to say.
But, since we are under grace and not legalistic law keeping, I think the Holy Spirit will speak to the heart of each believing woman so that she will know how to dress appropriately.
If the red or yellow colors appeal to you, then don't worry about wearing them, I'd say, unless they are premeditated, purposeful attention-getters. But, I don't think that's at all what you had in mind. :hug
 

Pebbles

Well-Known Member
Thank you, ladies. Just got a red cardi. :thumbup

I don't have a boyfriend or husband to worry about dressing properly for, so I am assuming that suddenly wanting to wear skirts and girly stuff (right after getting into real Christianity) is God saying, "Dress like this for me." (Does He do that, or am I just being weird? No, I don't hear voices. :) ). Just going to follow His lead and see where this goes. :nod

Strategic Outfit Planning:

- My skirts are floor length maxis, for a few reasons- it can get very windy on campus and I want to avoid a Marilyn Moment, any shorter and I feel unsafe, and they're comfy.

- I layer with a longer tunic-style t-shirt or tank top under a cardigan. This, again, is for multiple reasons- I cannot stand long sleeved shirts, but can tolerate elbow-length outer layers, and they partially cover my rear ('cause y'know...maxi skirt). I also don't do low cut- scar (tends to draw eyeballs...not good). I also have a twelve-inch difference between my waist and hips, so layers kinda help disguise that. :)

- I wear minimal makeup because I'm not good at it, and I'm so pale that anything other than the lightest bronze/brown shadow looks clownish. I also don't wear jewelry, outside of earrings for class presentations (as in, look at the earrings...NOT my face, thanks :lol:). Just personal preference, nothing against ladies who wear more.

- My campus is also military friendly and I've got a class on base...the number of soldiers calling me "Ma'am" and opening doors has increased since wearing skirts. :scratch:

On the downside, I still can't curl my hair. :hairout:
 

ReadyforSupper

Well-Known Member
I applaud you for this growth! You're not doing anything that we didn't do, once our desire to serve Christ and honor Him got to "that" point! I wear ankle length skirts all the time. Even using a chainsaw, lol.

I usually wear tiered skirts because they're feminine, but I won't wear anything that's tight enough to require a split. When it's cold, I wear leggings and (depending) petticoats under my skirts.

I also wear long maxi's with a shrug (like a half cardigan, not one of those hoochie ones) and sandals (I never wear sandals to church).

No cleavage showing. We're not to put ourselves on display because that's of the world and we're to be separate.

The Spirit will guide you and you'll know, as you choose something, whether it will please the Lord or not. Always remember this (and believe it or not, this was something our pastor told our husbands in a Sunday morning service): God knows how cute these new styles are. He knows that women love shoes more than women love air. He knows that we'd love to buy these great, form fitting fashions with those most excellent new suede boots (you know, the ones that lace down the front and make you seven inches taller?). He knows. He also knows that when we choose to deny the flesh to honor Him that we do it out of love and respect for Him. You've made a sacrifice to the Lord. He honors that!
 

Lynn

Longing for Home
the number of soldiers calling me "Ma'am" and opening doors has increased since wearing skirts. :scratch:

On the downside, I still can't curl my hair. :hairout:
Pebbles, I've experienced the old fashioned gallantry you describe when going through doors, and it's really nice. Men look at women with respect when they see that the women respect themselves enough to dress in a modest manner.

You mention not being able to curl your hair. Perhaps it would be helpful to view the video tutorial on sock curls that I posted on the thread about 'perm no more' a cautionary tale.
 

livingskies

Well-Known Member
I love you folks down south :hug
apart from modesty I think its more a cultural thing... Like what is immodest or disrespectful in your society. Like in 2 Timothy - the braids and hair adornments I more see as akin to high maintenance stuff - there is no end to how we can fake ourselves, from facelifts and plastic surgery to hilites, fake nails, eyelashes etc. Not salvation issues but draw attention to our outer shells, our jars of clay as you will. The whole point is to make beautiful the inside, and clothe our hearts with modesty, humility, mercy, love, kindness..... That is where we should spend our time, effort, resources :). :hat:
 
Last edited:

athenasius

Well-Known Member
I am chiming in very late on this thread. I was thinking a bit about the war on God given gender attributes, and one of the things that gays imitate about women and lesbians lose is the business of looking attractively feminine.

There is a world of difference between being attractive, meaning making the best of things within the constraints of your personal life (budget, time etc) without taking away from priorities (taking time for reading God's Word, prayer, doing the work God has in front of you each day)

and

being what the world calls "sexy" meaning allure for the sake of drawing men's attention. That would include dressing to cause envy in other women (I can afford Chanel, you can't sort of attitude or I'm up to the minute in fashion, sucks to be you attitude.) That is another negative drawing attention.

But there is another extreme and that is drawing negative attention by being obviously non feminine. (the obvious attention grabbing weird hair and clothing and lack of makeup that borders on the scary--the look that goes into no makeup ever, and almost seeks out the least feminine or attractive clothes)

I see the balance as not scaring the multitudes off of Christianity, and being a glory to my husband, not embarrassing him or becoming (heaven forfend) alluring to other men. Modest but not weird.

That as several of you point out is very much a cultural thing, and local norms may vary. I like the YMMV acronym for "your mileage may vary".

Due to my auto immune issues, my eyebrows are almost gone, and I look sick without a little help so I view makeup and good colour choice in clothing as essential to my husband's mental health, not to mention mine, all while reminding the enemy that while I may be losing a health battle here and there, I'm still here fighting. It's almost like me sending a message that I'm not losing the war at all, not no how, I'm still kicking, serving God and if the enemy stole my eyebrows I'm not taking it lying down!

So I put my makeup on every morning, replacing those eyebrows, evening out the skin with a little powder on top of Olay sunscreen (no need to deteriorate any faster than I have to). I stick a nice neutral blush on to replace the colour I've lost, beige eyeshadow to hide the dark marks and redness, mascara to enhance the lashes I have left, and lipstick to give back normal looking colour. When I'm done, I look nice but it's not the kind of makeup that sells well in ads because unless you knew what I look like without it, you wouldn't think I have any on at all. At night I carefully remove it and put good retinol cream on from Neutrogena (cheap & effective). I get the makeup from Clinique and Estee Lauder to send another message that I'm supporting Jewish business, especially the Lauder group so in your face BDS movement.

I wasn't graying attractively, so I dye the hair a shade that still looks normal with my skin and age. I get a regular cut so I look like I take care of myself which keeps my husband happy, because he doesn't like it when I skimp on hair cuts. I used to do it myself with sewing shears and a vacuum cleaner to hold the hair up and out checking for off cut areas, but I found a gal that does it for a bargain rate, and dh is happier.

I'm careful with colour choice because some colours next to my face make me look better, and some definitely the opposite. Since I refuse to look any sicker than I have to, I employ more feminine weapons and use good colour that looks good on me.

I choose classic clothing that never exposes extra flesh partly for modesty but also because those clothes are sunscreen, and as with the face cream, no need to wrinkle out and get freckles in places I don't have to. :rolleyes: I find by basing my clothes on neutrals with pops of happy colour it keeps my dh cheery and me too. Plus it's easy on the budget.

I always wear a little jewelry that goes with the outfit of the day, it's often earrings from the clearance racks at my favourite clothing emporiums but I choose it like the makeup and clothes to emphasize that I'm not a man, I'm a woman, and I like to look nice for dh. I choose scarves often to help preserve my clothes (a chic form of a bib if you ask me) as well as add a soft feminine touch of colour and print to my very neutral classic outfits.

I want to emphasize that it's ok to be feminine. We don't have to do the christian version of the burka and almost erase ourselves from existence. I notice and deeply approve of the feminine prints and cuts that some of the ladies on this thread use. It's going to be different for everyone. Someone may dress all in grey, and that can look stunning too. I wear pants often, but they are never too tight, and always in a dark neutral and classic cut and fabric.

My bottom line (pun intended):D is that it should glorify God first and foremost and for those of us with husbands, it should please them. This means there isn't one look fits all. Nor a single makeup technique or hairdo that works for all but in all things we do glorify God by showing that we are thankful we were created female. And that means a feminine modest joyous approach to our appearance.
 

pixelpusher

Well-Known Member
If I may intrude once more, cautiously, I would like to ask why do women love shoes so much?

One of the funniest things I ever heard my mom say, she said to my DW: "When I die, you are going to be so ill with me."
"Why?", my wife asked.
"Because when you are cleaning out my house, you are going to find the hundreds of pairs of shoes I have. And none of them fit you!"

Then she purely cackled.
 

Micki

MARANATHA!!
It's my understanding that we shouldn't attract attention for what we wear. We should be known for our devotion to The Savior and our good deeds. If you are not dressing provocatively, loud, obnoxious or disgusting I can't see the problem with colors. Didn't Elohim create colors and the parts of the eyes that recognize colors?
 

livingskies

Well-Known Member
Lol. You might find me scary. I never wear makeup, am usually in sweats or jeans and a T-shirt with a ponytail, cut my hair once a year or two at a bargain price and mail it to locks of Love to be made into wigs. I am all about comfort and practical :). Not saying everyone or anyone should be like me. Takes all kinds.
 

ShilohRose

Well-Known Member
If I may intrude once more, cautiously, I would like to ask why do women love shoes so much?

One of the funniest things I ever heard my mom say, she said to my DW: "When I die, you are going to be so ill with me."
"Why?", my wife asked.
"Because when you are cleaning out my house, you are going to find the hundreds of pairs of shoes I have. And none of them fit you!"

Then she purely cackled.
That's a good question. I'm not certain I can answer it all that well. I'm a cowgirl boot sort of girl now, but I used to love my high heels. One answer I have heard is that a ladies' shoe size generally doesn't change very much, and even if a lady gains weight, she can always wear a good looking shoe. ;)

It's kinda like asking why a lady needs so many red lipsticks . . .
 

athenasius

Well-Known Member
If I may intrude once more, cautiously, I would like to ask why do women love shoes so much?

One of the funniest things I ever heard my mom say, she said to my DW: "When I die, you are going to be so ill with me."
"Why?", my wife asked.
"Because when you are cleaning out my house, you are going to find the hundreds of pairs of shoes I have. And none of them fit you!"

Then she purely cackled.
Your mum knows, your wife knows, every woman on this thread knows but you asked. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Shoes. hmmm well it's like this. I like that if dh and I look down, that a- he likes what he sees on my feet, and b-my feet don't look masculine and c- I don't trip.

Then there is the business of making the whole outfit look like it cost a lot more even when it didn't. Which gets back to me making dh look good as a great provider and all round terrific guy which he is. Beyond that I don't think I can fully explain it, except that shoes and purses, scarves and jewelry fall into the useful category of accessories by which you can make a simple, cheap wardrobe of a few outfits look like an expensive wardrobe filled with choice.

For years dh and I were trying to get by on very very very little, so that we could homeschool our teens. God provided, but He also provided ingenuity in stretching those resources. I remember a particularly nice classic pair of leather heels, black, elegant things that cost me a whole dollar at a garage sale. Even then that was a bit tight for something so "frivolous". But they spiffed up many an outfit till they cracked and died of old age. Oddly enough, like the children of Israel in the wilderness those heels died just before our budget loosened up some and I could afford to buy shoes in the store. By wearing something like my beautiful heels, I could change the look, so I wasn't wearing the same old same old. Those shoes gave me confidence that I was dressed well for church, that my dh wasn't embarrassed that he couldn't afford to have me look nice AND have me stay home to homeschool our teens. Even when I didn't wear them, just the fact they were in the closet ready to go if I needed a nice classic pair of elegant heels gave me confidence. The confidence isn't in the shoes, but it is in God's ability to provide. They are the evidence of a moment of His provision.

Due to health issues which are beyond my control, my eyebrows went missing in action. So in defiance of the enemy and the illness and the general decay of the planet, I paint a new set on, and carry on. Due to financial challenges it's sometimes necessary to make a beer budget look like champagne simply because that is a kick in the teeth to the enemy and brings honor to my husband. Due to the decay of modern civilization many women try to look like men, and I prefer to be the woman God made me, and honor my husband.

Beyond that the lust for shoes, purses, jewelry, clothes and makeup can deteriorate into sheer greed or be motivated by envy, wanting to look better than others, not just your best for your husband, your budget and your circumstances. A woman's conscience is her guide if she is living a Godly life. I will always admire a lovely pair of shoes or a beautiful scarf, but I don't always have to own it to appreciate it, any more than I could acquire a sunset or a piece of art that I admire. The true test is whether I can admire it on someone else without envy or jealousy. And whether I can give it away when God asks me to, laying it down for someone else to enjoy. Letting go of a prized possession --brand new just because God says. Giving a complement even to another woman's choice of shoes because they are lovely on her and it's a joy when someone else is blessed.

Paul's comment on gold and braids is pertinent here, because the focus is never the clothes makeup or hairdo or even the shoes. He brought the focus back to modesty and Godliness. That is where the priorities lie. The Proverbs 31 woman dresses her family in scarlet which speaks of beauty, and wool and fine linen which speak of comfort as well as appropriateness to season and situation. These aren't worn out rags or the finery and trappings of a harlot, these are good clothes for the whole family. She brings honor to her husband. She works hard, she uses her God given talents in her particular situation to bring glory to God. She doesn't slip on her husbands shoes or wear his garments or do his job. She wears her own clothes, does her work, takes care of the things God entrusts to her. God gave women an innate desire for beauty which seems to apply to home making as well as choosing clothes, even food for the household. Do we pick the ugly banana bunch or the nicer looking one? Shoes are the same.
 

athenasius

Well-Known Member
I was thinking about this issue again recently. Bumping it up. The war on gender. Why are men and women forced to be unisex. No differences allowed, gender equality, gender fluidity. Why are the God given attributes and complementary abilities of the two sexes so under attack.

I have an idea that it's part of the curse that comes when we deny God as creator, as Romans says.

I think it may be because of the hatred Satan has towards the human race.
 
Last edited:

Hol

Worships Him
Thanks Athanasius, wit & great tips don't disguise the deeper spiritual maturity & true inner beauty that you possess. Today's world is full of indifference and a female/male unisex blend.

Let's remember Sarah, captivating beauty at any age, and invest in becoming the woman our husbands deserve.

Except that I'm single, and am in desperate need to learn makeup & formal dressing tips for my son's upcoming wedding.

So, as a picture w/o pictures, I need help putting on makeup that hides my uneven aging skin tones, doesn't make my wrinkles jump off the map, and isn't so heavy that should I cry at their wedding I look like a mud puddle!!

And what about shoes? Why are the really comfortable & stylish ones so expensive! Do I worry that the color matches my hemline??

Speaking of hemlines, I need a to the floor formal as MOG (Mother of the Groom) with sequence & flowing skirts. If I get something I can afford, maybe I can accessorize. What do you think about high end accessories? And how would a small clutch hinder my motherly duties?

Can you please help with all of my STRESS that gets me excited to drop my fishing pole mentality for my son's wedding? (BTW, my soon to be DIL has the most beautiful smile & set of teeth I've seen. Me, too much coffee, etc.)

Thanks for any help ❤
 

athenasius

Well-Known Member
Match hemline? Nah, blend with it yes. So if you are wearing navy or plum or burgundy shoes or sandals in black or dull soft silver would be nice. If you are wearing beige or pale peach or brown then a beigey nude or soft dull gold would be nice. Beigey nude that blends with the skin tone is supposed to be the universal neutral. If you can find a match, great, that would be perfect but if that doesn't happen, you don't need to sweat that one.

Clutch needs to fit an iphone so you can take pics for sure, and a lipstick or gloss for touch ups. Kleenex for obvious reasons and money plus credit card for emergencies, taxi back etc. one or 2 bandaids in case of a blister. a couple of Tylenols in a twist of wax paper in case of a headache. A pack of Tic Tacs in case of dry mouth. A roll of antacids can save the day in case the food is ...ahem .....hard to digest. or your tummy is just stressed.

off the clutch and on to 2 other topics: you'll smile till your cheeks hurt so if your lips and teeth tend to dry and stick. Sigh I know lovely visual eh? Try a fine slick of Vaseline on your front teeth before going out the door. Models do it to keep their mouths moving. Gee, not like I know anything about THAT! (dh's nickname for me is MAGPIE) It's just mineral oil, and it isn't a lot that you'll ingest... but it just may help with the "if I stop smiling and relax my lips are still stuck" situation.

second lifesaver. Waterproof mascara. This is a teary eyed happy time. Even if you never use it again, it's the moment for a waterproof mascara that won't run smear, smudge flake or fall off the face.
 
Top