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Thread: Differences Between Man and Women

                  
   
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  1. #1
    LivnForChrist's Avatar
    LivnForChrist is offline Jesus Christ is Lord

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    Default Differences Between Man and Women

    Names

    If Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara.

    If John, Brad, Tony and Daniel go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Jay, Bubba, T-Bone, and Godzilla.

    Eating Out

    When the bill arrives, John, Brad, Tony and Daniel will each throw in $20, even though the total is only $34.25. None of them will have any smaller bills and none will admit they want change back.

    When Mary, Susan, Claire and Barbara get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

    Money

    A man will pay $10 for a $5 item he needs.

    A woman will pay $5 for a $10 item that she doesn't need, because it's on sale.

    Bathrooms

    A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, razor, shaving cream, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Motel 6.

    The average number of items in a woman's bathroom is 328. The average man would not be able to identify most of them.

    Arguments


    Women always have the last word in an argument. Anything a man adds after that is the beginning of a new argument.

    Cats


    Women love cats.

    Men may say they love cats, but when women are not looking, men will kick cats.

    Future

    A woman worries about the future -- until she gets a husband.

    A man never worries about the future -- until he gets a wife.

    Success

    A successful man is one who makes more money than can be spent by his wife.

    A successful woman is one who can find that man.

    Marriage


    A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

    A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

    Dressing Up


    A woman will dress up when she goes shopping, empties the garbage, answers the phone, waters the plants, gets the mail and reads a book.

    A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

    Natural


    Men wake up looking as good as when they went to bed.

    Women will somehow deteriorate during the night.

    Children


    A woman knows all about her children. She knows about their best friends, romances, secret hopes and dreams, favorite foods, fears and dental appointments.

    A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

    Thought for the Day


    Married men should forget their mistakes. There is no need for two people to remember the same thing.



    Jesus, coming soon to a cloud near you.

  2. #2
    Patiently... is offline Citizen

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    Default Re: Differences Between Man and Women


  3. #3
    mattfivefour's Avatar
    mattfivefour is online now Moderator

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    Default Re: Differences Between Man and Women

    Too funny. Too true.
    -------"You are not your own; you are bought with a price." —1 Corinthians 6:19b-20a

    ------ ------ ------

  4. #4
    Meg
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    Default Re: Differences Between Man and Women

    Very funny and mostly true!

  5. #5
    king'sbloomingrose's Avatar
    king'sbloomingrose is offline He is able to save

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    Default Re: Differences Between Man and Women

    Funny! I love it!
    But they that wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

  6. #6
    anath is offline I Love the Lord

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    Default Re: Differences Between Man and Women



    Amazing love! How can it be that Thou, my God, shouldst die for me?




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