Christian One-Liners

[SonSeeker]

Don't let your worries get the best of you;
Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

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Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
Until you try to sit in their pews.

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Many folks want to serve God,
But only as advisers.

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It is easier to preach ten sermons
Than it is to live one.

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The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose,
But mosquitoes come close.

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When you get to your wit's end,
You'll find God lives there.

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People are funny; they want the front of the bus,
Middle of the road,
And back of the church.

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Opportunity may knock once,
But temptation bangs on the front door forever.

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Quit griping about your church;
If it was perfect, you couldn't belong.

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If a church wants a better pastor,
It only needs to pray for the one it has.

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We're called to be witnesses, not lawyers or Judges.

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God Himself doesn't propose to judge a man until
he is dead. So why should you?

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Some minds are like concrete
Thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

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Peace starts with a smile.

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I don't know why some people change churches;
What difference does it make which one you stay home from?

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A lot of church members singing 'Standing on the Promises'
Are just sitting on the premises.

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Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.

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Stop, Drop, and Roll won't work in Hell.

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Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.

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Don't put a question mark where God put a period.

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Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.

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Forbidden fruits create many jams.

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God doesn't call the qualified,
He qualifies the called.

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God grades on the cross, not the curve.

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God loves everyone,
But probably prefers 'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts!'

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God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.

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He who angers you, controls you!
(We need to remember this!!)
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If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!

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Prayer:
Don't give God instructions, just report for duty!

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The task ahead of us is never as
great as the Power behind us.

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The Will of God never takes you to where the
Grace of God will not protect you.

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We don't change the message,
The message changes us.

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You can tell how big a person is
By what it takes to discourage him.

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The best mathematical equation I have ever seen:
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

[mattfivefour]

I absolutely LOVE these, bro.


But "it is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one" hits a little too close to the mark!!!

[billym]

I like this one best

The best mathematical equation I have ever seen:
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

[FaithInChrist]

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
Until you try to sit in their pews.


That one is my husband, he is a hawk, and even willing to carry my purse to go sit it at "our spot" to "reserve" our seats.

These are all great, thanks for a chuckle and some eye openers too.

[IamPJ]

Those were good. Thanks for sharing. I had to laugh at the one about the pews, too!

[SteveJM]

A lot of great quotes. I'll have to copy and paste them into a folder for later use. It would be interesting to know who these one liners originated from. Maybe some were inspired from the Holy Spirit. God does have a sense of humor. Thanks for sharing them.

[livin_in_the_Son]

Stop, Drop, and Roll Won't work in Hell!

I have this bumper sticker on the mothership (my minivan).A lot of good quotes, thanks for sharing.

[SonSeeker]

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
Until you try to sit in their pews.


That one is my husband, he is a hawk, and even willing to carry my purse to go sit it at "our spot" to "reserve" our seats.

These are all great, thanks for a chuckle and some eye openers too.

Does your purse match his shoes?

[SonSeeker]

I absolutely LOVE these, bro.


But "it is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one" hits a little too close to the mark!!!

You're right where He wants you, Adrian.