Let me explain. I deliver pizzas for a living and so I go to many houses and meet many people. One Guy that is a regular customer ordered yesterday. I have not delivered to him for awhile though as it's been someone else
anyhow, I talk to him for very short maybe 2 minutes at the most usually when I deliver pizza and knew he was Catholic since he said he was. He is a very kind man and sincere as we found out that we listened to the same Christian radio show. So there was a little gleam of hope that just maybe he was not lost. But it never settled well with me although he's very kind.
Okay, yesterday, he asked me how my Christmas was and I told him and then I asked him and he elaborated. Somehow I don't know how we were in a full blown not in anger at all but the kind of conversation that is unproductive where I was pointing out to him I don't agree with Catholicism and they are unbiblical and he talked about Mary and I said we don't pray to her and he said we don't pray to her we ask for her to pray to us.. On and on with ripostes back and forth with him trying to correct me and me trying to correct him. I told him how it's unbiblical that we are not to pray to the dead and Mary is not the mother of God she's the mother of Jesus. This must have gone on for 30 minutes. Thankfully we were not busy yet and My manager understood when I apologized for being so late.
Do you get what happened though? Has this ever happened to you? I was not upset talking to him but it was my manor because I was so zealous for him to know the truth and I did not handle myself properly with gentleness and patience and kindness. I let all that zeal just ruin everything. I utterly failed and I don't want to do that way again. The only thing I can think of is this is definitely not my gift. Maybe I just need to give up since I'm better at just praying and keep my mouth shut
I care and love the man but I was so upset at failing and messing up so badly I don't want to share anymore. I just messed up so badly..