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  1. #1
    myinnuendo999 is offline Citizen

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    Default Ever feel like an utter failure

    Let me explain. I deliver pizzas for a living and so I go to many houses and meet many people. One Guy that is a regular customer ordered yesterday. I have not delivered to him for awhile though as it's been someone else

    anyhow, I talk to him for very short maybe 2 minutes at the most usually when I deliver pizza and knew he was Catholic since he said he was. He is a very kind man and sincere as we found out that we listened to the same Christian radio show. So there was a little gleam of hope that just maybe he was not lost. But it never settled well with me although he's very kind.

    Okay, yesterday, he asked me how my Christmas was and I told him and then I asked him and he elaborated. Somehow I don't know how we were in a full blown not in anger at all but the kind of conversation that is unproductive where I was pointing out to him I don't agree with Catholicism and they are unbiblical and he talked about Mary and I said we don't pray to her and he said we don't pray to her we ask for her to pray to us.. On and on with ripostes back and forth with him trying to correct me and me trying to correct him. I told him how it's unbiblical that we are not to pray to the dead and Mary is not the mother of God she's the mother of Jesus. This must have gone on for 30 minutes. Thankfully we were not busy yet and My manager understood when I apologized for being so late.

    Do you get what happened though? Has this ever happened to you? I was not upset talking to him but it was my manor because I was so zealous for him to know the truth and I did not handle myself properly with gentleness and patience and kindness. I let all that zeal just ruin everything. I utterly failed and I don't want to do that way again. The only thing I can think of is this is definitely not my gift. Maybe I just need to give up since I'm better at just praying and keep my mouth shut


    I care and love the man but I was so upset at failing and messing up so badly I don't want to share anymore. I just messed up so badly..

  2. #2
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    seank6 is offline Citizen

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    you are not a a failure at all!! that's satan whispering in your ear. its great you had zeal for the truth!!and you were showing him love by sharing the truth of the gospel with him. sometimes we try so hard to be great apologists and evangelists like Jesus but that is something we can never achieve cause He was perfect. so bottom line great job!!
    Last edited by seank6; December-27th-2011 at 10:46 AM. Reason: im not perfect either cant spell!!
    Phillipians 4: 8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable -- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy -- think about such things. 9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me -- put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (NIV)

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    God will change the situation for his will and purpose in your life.

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    ...I personally think you did a good job myself. You spoke the truth, you didn't yell, or call names. I can't do that. Don't feel bad...if the guy was offended by your zeal, he would have called your manager. Maybe he needed someone to be sharp with him to open his eyes.
    Meg and seank6 like this.

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    LivnForChrist is offline Jesus Christ is Lord

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    You did what you were supposed to do; You presented the truth to him in love.
    You may be wallowing in a sense of defeat but he may be turning over some of the
    things you said in his mind. Pray that what you said to him take root.



    Jesus, coming soon to a cloud near you.

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    mattfivefour is offline Moderator

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    I agree with the posters above who have replied to you. The only thing I can add is 2 Peter 1:5. Add to your faith ... knowledge. Knowing the Scriptures and specifically which ones reveal the great doctrinal truths is the only thing that can alter a witnessing conversation from my opinion vs their opinion, my point vs their point, to what God said. It is not hard to amass the scriptural knowledge providing you have acquired knowledge of what the RCC teaches and what it actually practices. A very useful tool is Frontline Ministries - Witnessing to Roman Catholics. It will help with everything you need to prepare yourself for future encounters with RCC followers. But, as I said, the secret of ANY witnessing or ANY discussion of Christianity is not to argue one's beliefs but only present what God's Word says ... in context and in conjunction with the other verses on the subject. This is why we need to "Be diligent to present yourself approved to God as a workman who does not need to be ashamed, accurately handling the word of truth." (2 Timothy 2:15 NASB)

    BTW, the KJV "Study to show yourself" is a poor translation for today as the word "study" now means applying our mind to the acquiring of knowledge through investigation, detailed examination and analysis. But the KJV used it in a sense closer to its Latin root: studēre, which means to devote oneself. However, today, that is not how we understand the word. The word in Greek is the imperative form of σπουδάζω (spoudazo, Ipronounced spoo=DAD-zo) which means to be fervent, zealous, diligent or earnest about something. Thus the Holy Spirit is telling us through Paul that we must be earnest and diligent to the point of fervency in our acquiring mastery of the Word of God so that we may be pleasing to Him when He sends us to serve Him in the furtherance of the Great Commission that He gave to us. This does not mean that we cannot witness unless we are masters of scripture. Not at all. But it does mean that we take His word into our hearts and minds. The Holy Spirit will then bring it to our minds as we need it.
    -------"You are not your own; you are bought with a price." —1 Corinthians 6:19b-20a

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    Meg
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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Sis, first, I don't think you are a failure. Your customer hopefully got the impression that you do care about truth and hopefully that you desire whats best for him. I have no doubt you are praying for him, which is the first best move at this point. Should you see him again, at that point please keep it light and casual, giving the friendship ground to mend. Then, should further opportunities come up to pursue the discussion, try placing the focus on Jesus Christ. Point out that by praying to Mary, your customer is neglecting Jesus Christ, cutting Him out of the relationship. Suggest that faith is confidence in God's integrity, and that Jesus Christ deliberately permitted Himself to be crucified so that we might approach God through Him by praying to Him, and see how your customer reacts to that idea. Take it slow, and give ideas time to sink in.

    Catholicism often leaves people intimidated by the idea of God. The backlash effect of all that formality makes God seem distant, cold and unapproachable. For this reason, Catholicism often fails in a time of crisis, which is why my sister is an atheist, and may be one reason why not one of my nephews or nieces will go to any church. It is very tricky witnessing to Catholics. I hope some of what we have shared helps in the future.

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    anath is offline I Love the Lord

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Quote Originally Posted by LivnForChrist View Post
    You did what you were supposed to do; You presented the truth to him in love.
    You may be wallowing in a sense of defeat but he may be turning over some of the
    things you said in his mind. Pray that what you said to him take root.
    Thank you Lord for our dear sister's love courage and boldness to speak the Truth.
    Thank you Lord for the opportunity you gave her to share the Truth with a longtime customer. Lord we come to you in agreement that the seeds she planted will grow and take root in this man's heart. In Jesus Name we pray, Amen.


    Amazing love! How can it be that Thou, my God, shouldst die for me?




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    Robert is offline Citizen

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Quote Originally Posted by myinnuendo999 View Post
    Let me explain. I deliver pizzas for a living and so I go to many houses and meet many people. One Guy that is a regular customer ordered yesterday. I have not delivered to him for awhile though as it's been someone else

    anyhow, I talk to him for very short maybe 2 minutes at the most usually when I deliver pizza and knew he was Catholic since he said he was. He is a very kind man and sincere as we found out that we listened to the same Christian radio show. So there was a little gleam of hope that just maybe he was not lost. But it never settled well with me although he's very kind.

    Okay, yesterday, he asked me how my Christmas was and I told him and then I asked him and he elaborated. Somehow I don't know how we were in a full blown not in anger at all but the kind of conversation that is unproductive where I was pointing out to him I don't agree with Catholicism and they are unbiblical and he talked about Mary and I said we don't pray to her and he said we don't pray to her we ask for her to pray to us.. On and on with ripostes back and forth with him trying to correct me and me trying to correct him. I told him how it's unbiblical that we are not to pray to the dead and Mary is not the mother of God she's the mother of Jesus. This must have gone on for 30 minutes. Thankfully we were not busy yet and My manager understood when I apologized for being so late.

    Do you get what happened though? Has this ever happened to you? I was not upset talking to him but it was my manor because I was so zealous for him to know the truth and I did not handle myself properly with gentleness and patience and kindness. I let all that zeal just ruin everything. I utterly failed and I don't want to do that way again. The only thing I can think of is this is definitely not my gift. Maybe I just need to give up since I'm better at just praying and keep my mouth shut


    I care and love the man but I was so upset at failing and messing up so badly I don't want to share anymore. I just messed up so badly..
    No you didn't sis.

    First, I agree with everyone else: you did just fine. When we're trying to tell someone the truth in the Lord, the Adversary will often attempt to sabotage our efforts by whispering in our ears. He knows that the mind is the most susceptible part of a human being; if he can win a battle there, the rest is easy.

    Second: we can only spread the gospel; we cannot make people believe it. This doesn't mean we should limit our efforts, but we do recognize that we cannot make someone listen to our message. Only God can soften a hardened heart and draw someone to Him, and if the person in question is not going to give it a chance, then all we can do is to pray for them and continue to do what the Lord lays on our hearts to do. One plants, another waters, but God gives the increase.

    Myinnuendo, don't give up on this man but continue to pray for him. For the longest time, my words to my dad fell on deaf ears as it were until a week or two after my mom died. Dad ended up getting saved, five months before he joined my mom in eternity.




    -Robert

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    Everlasting Life is offline Through Faith in Jesus

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    God will use your words to work in his mind. :-) Whenever I have conversations like that I pray that God would remove the unnecessary words and cause the useful ones to be magnified in the person's mind. It may be that God used you to plant seeds and others will reap.....don't be discouraged, trust God that He will continue the work, after all...it is His work.

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    myinnuendo999 is offline Citizen

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    I am SoOO comforted by all of you. I have a heart that is soothed with the truth from your lips--or should I say finger tips from God. I have resorted to praying for Him many times as the Lord lays him on my heart to soften his heart and prepare good soil.

    He did call the store right after I returned from talking to him to invite me to study the word of God with him. I'm not confident with sharing with a man first of all and secondly I know the word of God pretty well, but I didn't think it prudent for me to be in such a situation. I don't know where the verses are in the Old Testament that tell us not to pray to the dead for example--I need to learn them. (Thanks mattfivefour for the link you gave me to help me). I'm strong in some areas but not in witnessing to Catholics. I thanked the man his name is Joe but I told him I didn't think it was a good idea to come together with our bibles but just to resort in praying for him..

    I thank God for all of you and how each of you have cheered me up with the TRUTH. Honestly I was expecting a bit of criticism. I recon the enemy is really at me lately. Praise the Lord!! and I love all of you in Christ
    Robert, Meg and livin_in_the_Son like this.

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    Everlasting Life is offline Through Faith in Jesus

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Is there a pastor you could refer him too?

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    dave-o is offline Citizen

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    It is God who gives the increase and the Holy Sprint that actually speaks. I know this might sound a bit strange but there's a possibility that what you said is not what that man heard in his heart.

    BTW I think you should just go and trust completely in the power of the Holy Spirit. Don't even try to rehearse what you plan to say. This opportunity may be as much for you as for this man.

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    You have planted the seed of truth and only the Holy Spirit can make it grow. We don't always get to see instant conversion but that doesn't make you a failure.

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    LivnForChrist is offline Jesus Christ is Lord

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Quote Originally Posted by myinnuendo999 View Post
    He did call the store right after I returned from talking to him to invite me to study the word of God with him. I'm not confident with sharing with a man first of all and secondly I know the word of God pretty well, but I didn't think it prudent for me to be in such a situation. I don't know where the verses are in the Old Testament that tell us not to pray to the dead for example--I need to learn them. (Thanks mattfivefour for the link you gave me to help me). I'm strong in some areas but not in witnessing to Catholics. I thanked the man his name is Joe but I told him I didn't think it was a good idea to come together with our bibles but just to resort in praying for him..
    Thats wonderful!!! Pray and ask the Lord what he would have you to do. Praying with you.



    Jesus, coming soon to a cloud near you.

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Quote Originally Posted by dave-o View Post
    It is God who gives the increase and the Holy Sprint that actually speaks. I know this might sound a bit strange but there's a possibility that what you said is not what that man heard in his heart.

    BTW I think you should just go and trust completely in the power of the Holy Spirit. Don't even try to rehearse what you plan to say. This opportunity may be as much for you as for this man.
    I would like to add to this, if you decide to go, bring along a pastor, like someone suggested, but out of propriety and safety. If you choose to not rehearse, at least have the scripture references handy though so you're not rifling through your bible.

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Quote Originally Posted by dave-o View Post
    BTW I think you should just go and trust completely in the power of the Holy Spirit. Don't even try to rehearse what you plan to say. This opportunity may be as much for you as for this man.
    I agree with this, providing you have enough knowledge of scripture to begin with, which I suspect you already have. But Livin_in_the_Son's advice not to go alone is well-given! Take it. No man should ever go alone with a woman to whom he is not married or betrothed and no woman should ever go alone with a man to whom she is not married or betrothed. Billy Graham would not even get on an elevator with another woman! This is smart. Give the devil no place.
    -------"You are not your own; you are bought with a price." —1 Corinthians 6:19b-20a

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    Yeah not sure if this has been said yet, I just zipped through the comments, but remember you're there to proclaim the gospel, not necessarily win people; that's God's job and His alone.
    I remember a couple years back when I was not as learned about the Bible as I am now, I feel I lead people astray...assuming they took my advice. I was wrapped up in the prosperity gospel with mainly Joel Osteen. My friend who went to a church nearby said that the pastor's sermons made you feel like you could never do anything good to get to heaven....(I looked back now and am I like Gee...I wonder why!). And so I told him to listen to Osteen. Now I feel like a fool for having ever said that.
    Don't worry, things will work out. God knows everything and has already planned it.
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    daygo is offline Citizen

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    You have to remember one thing only, the holy spirit guides and convicts, we are the tools that are used. Just pray for them and let the holy spirit work in their lives, also be a good role model for them.
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    myinnuendo999 is offline Citizen

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    Default Re: Ever feel like an utter failure

    Thank you daygo,,, you reminded me once again of the verse that says "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."-Rom 8:28

    You know verses can become so knowable and commonplace that we don't let them really come alive by allowing the Holy Spirit to do his work in us.

    That verse usually is memorized and sits on the shelf in the back of our hearts. But GOD has illumined that verse to me this week...

    That verse gives me the proper perspective and sets me back on my feet with boldness in the Lord. I fail, I fail all the time, I make terrible messes and I don't necessarily say things just right and nor do I always approach people properly. But GOD,, takes all my failures, my messes, my imperfections and he works it all together for the good of those who love him. I have to believe the truth that He really is in complete control and he really is going to work it all out perfectly for His glory and honor. This frees me up from fretting, and it keeps me from allowing Satan to beat me up.

    "The battle is the Lord's"
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