Does being angry at someone hinder our relationship with the Lord?

**Hannah** · July-31st-2011, 02:00 AM

1JN 2:9 Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates his brother is still in the darkness. 10 Whoever loves his brother lives in the light, and there is nothing in him to make him stumble. 11 But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness; he does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded him.

1JN 2:12 I write to you, dear children,
because your sins have been forgiven on account of his name.

MT 5:23 "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

MT 18:21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"

MT 18:22 Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

The Bible does warn us not to harbour hatred or anger. We should take steps to forgive and reconcile if we are to come before the Lord and have our gifts to Him acceptable. You cannot remain in anger or harbour malice towards someone and think it will not affect your walk with the Lord.

Last year I wrote of how a good Christian friend who had attacked me and made accusations against me that I did not even know about. They had kept their bitterness to themselves and did not deal with it. Then it all came out. After the incident she didn't give me a chance to sort it out with her either. At first I was very upset by the attack and then by the rejection to sort it out. I have heard that this Christian woman (she isn't a young person here and like me she came to Jesus 30 years plus ago) is still making accusations to others that we both know. That too is upsetting that after all these years in the Lord she has not come to learn the need for forgiveness and to not hold onto anger and bitterness. I have prayed for both of us over this time since it has occurred and I hope this person I once cherished as a friend can learn the lessons of God's Word. First of all it isn't clear what she is accusing me of and I am sorry if my behaviour at times has hurt her but I can't get the opportunity to express that and I have left it with the Lord. In the end I cannot do anything to help her turn around and forgive me that has to come from her.

Just as happens in Life in the Real world here in our virutal place of relationship and fellowship there are probably many hurt people on this Board. I know that at times I have ruffled some people feathers. Some times I have upset people by having an opposite opinion and not because I have purposefully said something to offend. I have no desire to go around maliciously hurting anyone, life is too short to make enemies amongst brothers and sisters in Christ, we already have a Staunch Enemy doing all he can to hurt us and the Body of Christ. If I have hurt people out there I have not done so intentionally but that doesn't mean I haven't upset you by my words and I apologise.

If you can manage to forgive you will be doing yourself good and providing healing for the Body of Christ.

Jesus said this to his disciples:-

JN 13:34 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

Now my Christian friend and I met soon after we both came to Christ on University Campus and after so many years she ended up coming to this point and all our other friends cannot understand why she waited to finally blow up instead of telling me her issues earlier. Now it is in the open she is telling everybody who will listen what she feels & thinks about me. Fortunately the more mature Christians she has spoken to have given her some Godly advice, to go to me and try to reconcile and to forgive. I hope she does, years ago I did this towards my Father who hurt our family with his words and actions under the influence of alcohol. My Father also has mental illness & is really not able to understand what he has done or even to acknowledge what he has done so we just forgive him anyway. What is past is past now and we have moved on I certainly have healed from past hurts and I am now able to honour my father as the Bible commands us to do.

The only person you are hurting really is yourself if you are holding onto any anger or bitterness. I hope that those who read this might stop and think and forgive their brothers & sisters in Christ because we cannot be united in Christ and be angry to other parts of the same body. You hate yourself when you hate a brother or sister in Christ and it is only self defeating. Exactly what Satan likes to see, disunity in the Body of Christ.

1JN 3:11 This is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another. 12 Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother's were righteous. 13 Do not be surprised, my brothers, if the world hates you. 14 We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love our brothers. Anyone who does not love remains in death. 15 Anyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him.

1JN 3:16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. 17 If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? 18 Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. 19 This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence 20 whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.

1JN 3:21 Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God 22 and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him. 23 And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us. 24 Those who obey his commands live in him, and he in them. And this is how we know that he lives in us: We know it by the Spirit he gave us.

1JN 4:1 Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world. 2 This is how you can recognize the Spirit of God: Every spirit that acknowledges that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, 3 but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and even now is already in the world.

1JN 4:4 You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. 5 They are from the world and therefore speak from the viewpoint of the world, and the world listens to them. 6 We are from God, and whoever knows God listens to us; but whoever is not from God does not listen to us. This is how we recognize the Spirit of truth and the spirit of falsehood.

1JN 4:7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. 10 This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. 11 Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

Not my words but God's. You can hold onto hurts and wounds of the past if you like not my choice but yours OR you can lay them at the feet of Jesus get healed by forgiving.

**mattfivefour** · July-31st-2011, 11:45 AM

Excellent post, Hannah!

Yes, the Matthew 5:23 you quoted came to my mind as I read your topic. In fact I think, since it came from the lips of Jesus, that entire portion of the Sermon on the Mount is important:

"21 You have heard that the ancients were told, ‘you shall not commit murder’ and ‘Whoever commits murder shall be liable to the court.’ 22 But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother shall be guilty before the court; and whoever says to his brother, ‘You good-for-nothing,’ shall be guilty before the supreme court; and whoever says, ‘You fool,’ shall be guilty enough to go into the fiery hell. 23 Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24 leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering. 25 Make friends quickly with your opponent at law while you are with him on the way, so that your opponent may not hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the officer, and you be thrown into prison. 26 Truly I say to you, you will not come out of there until you have paid up the last cent." —Matthew 5:21-26

When you earnestly think on that for a while, it is quite disturbing. God is not to be trifled with and He clearly here, as our sister so ably points out, considers unforgiveness to be something that separates us from Him. Verse 26 is sobering in the extreme!

**Meg** · July-31st-2011, 12:00 PM

Lovely post, Hannah, I hope you yet find a way to be reconciled with your former friend. Forgiveness is indeed key to everything we try to accomplish as Christians. If we can only keep communicating until we fully understand each other, much bitterness could be avoided completely. May the Holy Lord continue to bless you deeply...

**king'sbloomingrose** · July-31st-2011, 03:24 PM

Your post reminds me of this cartoon:

Oh, and Matt, my pastor actually preached on those verses this morning at church. This is like so coincidental that that should be the theme today at church and on RF.

**mattfivefour** · July-31st-2011, 04:25 PM

Sis, there are NO coincidences in the life of a Christian. God is at His work for each of us in ALL things in our lives.

**Hannah** · August-1st-2011, 04:06 AM

Thanks for the comments everyone.

I've learned a long time ago when I had to deal with all my childhood issues that forgiving releases us from past hurts and enables us to keep growing in the Lord.

I like the cartoon KBR. It really illustrates what we do when we put up barriers against someone we are angry with instead of forgiving them and reconciling if possible.

The reason I posted this is because it was part of my Bible reading lately and I wanted to share it as it was a reminder to me of something that has benefitted not only my own walk with God but when we do forgive and get healing and have reconciliation it is of Great Benefit for the Body of Christ to remain United in the Love the Lord has demonstrated for us in His Son.

IMO Satan is made happy to see God's children squabbling instead of being focused together to share the Gospel of Salvation to the Lost.